So drunk its hurt
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
We need to get me chipped asap
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize