Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
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