it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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