I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Randomize
