Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
this hospital has no fireball
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Randomize
