Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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