WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
so let's talk penis.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
