go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Your mouth is God's brothel.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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