yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
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