I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
this is an emotional support booty call
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
