you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Randomize
