Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize
