Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
