I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦🏼♀️
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
