Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
