We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
