I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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