I like my sex mixed with concussions.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
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