oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
