She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Randomize
