i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Randomize
