Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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