I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
