I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
