Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize
