Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
