We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
