Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
