It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
