My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
