I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
