love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Randomize
