It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
