ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
