She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
