Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
