Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Randomize
