how can u be prego again
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
