That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize