scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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