If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
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