Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
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