When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
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