READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
