I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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