margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
