Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
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