butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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