Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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