last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
What changed your mind?
Being sober
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
you never un-have a 4some
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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